Some people became nervous in small matters, and some people never became nervous at all in any difficult situation.
What made the difference? self esteem does.
how much it would be good for you if you could give speech in front a lot of people without being nervous like your colleague.
Or how good it would be if you can give a presentation in front of thousand people.
Why the difference of self esteem?
Some people consider themselves to be worthy of that condition, and some people consider themselves to be ineligible.
5 Pillars Of Self Esteem
I will share 5 self esteem increasing tips from the guru of self esteem Nathaniel Branden‘s best selling book.
Pillar No 1 : The practice of living consciously
Most of the time when we are studying,we think about anything else. That means we’re doing something, but thinking another.
If we have this habit, how can we be attentive when needed?
If we don’t do any work attentively then how can we do anything properly? Our self esteem will decrease automatically if we can’t.
So the first thing you have to do to increase your self esteem is to be attentive to your work.
When we are studying we should stay at the present and just think the subject. Don’t think about a football match while studying.
Pillar No 2 : The practice of self acceptance
Suppose someone is too much black and if he/she cannot accept how he/she is then how can they become confident on public place?
Accept yourself what you are. And try to improve if possible.
There are 2 types of things in life
- What we can change (weight,thinking etc)
- What we can’t change (genetic structure,other’s thinking etc)
First of all accept yourself, then find out the things which you can change. Then practice for the change.
Don’t sit alone and think that your too fat go to gym.
Pillar No 3 : The practice of self responsibility
Someone failed in a exam and said “the question was so hard”.
And a failure boy said”I would have been successful today if my parents supported me”.
These two example blaming others for their failure. They just made own story and made them victim.
On the other side, Who takes responsibility of any situation of their life and when they failed they never blame others and try to improve all the time.
How their self esteem going to be? Obviously much better than those who plays blame game!
So stop playing blame game. Take responsibility of your failure and try do better next time.
Pillar No 4 : The practice of living purposefully
One is to enjoy life and other is to spend life, We need to have a purpose to enjoy our life.
There are two kinds of people in our society, one is who just works full day long and sleeps at night without having any major purpose.
How their self confident will be? Obviously low.
And there are some people who had a major purpose in their life and he wants a positive change in the world from their work, doesn’t matter if the change is little.
Like Malala Yousuf jai . They are passionate people.
How their self esteem or confident will be? It is high.
Malala never became nervous when she was talking with world leaders.
She had a purpose in her life which is female education.
How do you become confident if you are not passionate?
The passion will from your purpose.
Pillar No 5: The practice of personal integrity
If I tell it in one sentence “Always do the the thing that is right” Not only right for you that should be right for everyone.
Don’t lie to yourself, suppose a father forbids cigarette to his son but he takes 10 daily.
I mean the one who says one but do another.
That’s bad. It will down your self esteem.
To change this thing you have to practice the personal integrity.
So what should we do?
- Always stay at the present moment.
- Accept yourself,improve if possible.
- Take responsibility of every failure.
- Make a purpose and enjoy life.
- Try to practice which is good for you and everyone.